Crossroads

There’s so much going through my mind right now.  

                                                                              So much to say…  

                                                                                                              So much to do…  

But tonight is not the time for any of that.  It’s quiet.  Peaceful.  And I am completely alone.  There is so much in my heart that I will never understand.  It is like a clogged sink… so much goes in, but so little gets processed.  

I wish I could share with the world what’s really inside of me.  

                                                                                                  Share who I really am.  

But if I did that, I’m afraid of what would happen.  I’m afraid of who I really am.  I can’t focus on that, though.  There is more going on inside of me.  There is something so beautiful that compels me forward.  It’s inside of me, but I don’t know where it came from.  

I need to do something.  I can’t help but do something.  I just don’t know what it is yet.  I am seeking… seeking at another crossroads.  

Does everyone experience life this way?  

                                                                                                                       Has everyone felt this before?  

I know which way to choose, but I can’t find the choice.  But I am moving forward.  Always moving forward.  Sometimes I forget that, but in those times when I remember I can stop and think.  

I walk outside.  

                           A cool breeze.  

                                                        No one in sight.  

                                                                                          Just me, but I know that I am in the midst of chaos.  There is a world all around that is working: that is progressing.  There is a plane overhead.  It’s my proof.  I am but a piece of this great puzzle and there are so many people living their own lives right on top of me.  Nothing is guaranteed, and surprises come at any moment.  I know this plane could be on a mission to destroy.  It could use its technology to harm me.  But it wont be today.  Not on a day that I feel like this.  It is one of those days that, even though I am completely awestruck at my place in life and my future endeavors, I feel peace.  

Today there is rest.  But tomorrow…  That’s another story.


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