Writing Requires A Power Source

My mind overflows with energy.

I can't sleep like this.

I'm inspired.

It starts in the mind.

It's just an idea.

And it grows, gaining momentum like a boulder rolling down a hill.

The idea starts gaining electricity as it rubs against different experiences in my life.

It's the friction building the electric charge, waiting for it all to surge out in one electric shock.

It rolls from my mind down my body and through my arm, all the way to my fingertips.

There's a transference when I pick up my pencil, connecting my mind to the wood and forcing it to the paper like it's the perfect conductor.

It's an electric flow onto the paper, bursting with an electric surge.

This isn't mere words and punctuation.

These aren't random ideas.

This is writing requiring a power source.

It's elemental.

It's basic.

It's alive.

It's active writing: inspired writings meant to inspire others.

Betrayal

There's a game called never have I ever where you have to say something you've never done before. If you've done that thing, you have to stand up and find a new seat.

I wonder how many people would stand up if you said, never have I ever betrayed someone.

I would stand up.

When I was in junior high school, I rode the bus to school. My best friend got off the bus with me because he lived across the street. We grew up together and did everything together. We were brothers. There wasn't a time I can remember without him. Then one day, when I got off the bus with him, something happened. I don't remember what it was or why I did it.

I started a fight with him that day. We fought outside until his mother came out to stop it. Then I lied and said my best friend said something bad about me so he would get in trouble. I don't remember what he said or if he said anything at all. I just know that I betrayed him that day.

We lost a lot of time together because of me. I wasn't there for him during some of the hardest years of a boy's life. When I think about betrayal, I think about my best friend.

After you've betrayed someone and realized how terrible of a sin it is, you feel this tremendous amount of guilt. You want so badly just to make it up, to make things right, but it's impossible. There's nothing you can say or do to make your betrayal disappear. You're stuck in guilt, like a wave of water drowning you. Your heart sinks... Your spirit is discouraged... Your mind is spent...

This is betrayal. It's the pain of being totally rejected by another person. It's an outright, direct degradation of who they are. I'm a betrayer. I caused that pain and I can never undo it.

I've betrayed.

And Jesus was betrayed. His own disciple whom he loved for three years chose riches instead of faithfulness. Jesus was betrayed with a kiss. It was intentional and conniving. It was not merely one disciple who betrayed Jesus, though. Many followed and later turned away. Many cheered and later chanted, "Crucify Him!" Many were blessed and then watched as they scourged His flesh.

In Mathew 25, Jesus relates Himself with the hungry, thirsty, stranger, poor, and imprisoned. When I betrayed my best friend, was I also betraying Jesus? What does that mean?

I feel my guilt is appropriate because of the sin I've committed. How can I accept forgiveness? Jesus took my betrayal upon Himself on the cross. I betrayed, and yet Jesus bore the consequences for my betrayal. He was crucified as a betrayer, even though He was betrayed and innocent.

Jesus said, "Forgive them Father, for they know not what they do."

He forgave my sin.

I have an overwhelming sense of gratitude. I'm overcome. I feel I should say, sorry, but it's not right. It's the wrong response. The correct response is, Thank you. He has forgiven me, but I still have to apologize to my friend and amend the ways I've been wrong.

And there's more.

Jesus gave me his innocence. I'm no longer a betrayer. My betrayal has been replaced. I'm free of that bondage. I'm new again.

And there's more.

Jesus rose from the grave on the third day. He is stronger than death, incapable of staying down. He proved all He said and did by rising to confirm His work and our salvation.

And there's more.

Then He breathed on those who believe so they would be filled with the very Spirit of God.

This is grace. It's kindness. And now everything is different.

Don't call me a betrayer anymore. I've sinned, but it's not who I am. I'm who He says I am. Behold, all things have become new.

Amen.

Bullied

"Yes! I finally have enough money to buy the newest action figure! This is going to be awesome!"

Sam was so excited he couldn't contain all the electric currents inside of him making him move in impulsive dancing. He loves collecting action figures and creating his own world at home. It's all he can do to escape.

When you have a bully, you try to avoid him and run as much as possible. When the bullies live with you, there's nowhere you can turn and no one who can truly protect you.

Sam took the bus and went to the department store by himself. He uses public transportation to go to school, so even as an elementary school student, it's not hard.

The department store has a glamour his home doesn't. Everything always smells nice and looks quite clean. And all the people are dressed in designer clothing with smiles on their faces. Sam never feels like he fits in.

He went straight to the toy department and saw that action figure he was looking for. He ran up to the register and dumped all the coins and notes onto the counter. It was just the right amount, the exact price.

He took the action figure and ran back to the bus stop. It seemed like forever waiting for that bus and Sam kept peeking inside his bag at the action figure inside. With every peek, that excitement came rolling through his stomach and up his body, rolling into his smile that wouldn't fade from his face.

Even what seems like forever will come. And that bus did come and he made it back to his room and he tuned out everything else to focus on what he had in his bag. He ripped it open and held it in his hands. That's when the voice beckoned through the apartment.

"Hey! Where's the money Mom left for us to buy dinner?" His brother slammed through his door and stared at him with a face full of rage.

Fear set in. All the excitement over his action figure left him in an instant and he tried to think of a way out. You see, he took that money to buy his action figure, not thinking about what his brother and sister would eat later. So he lied, "it wasn't me," because he was scared, because he knew what happened last time, and the time before that, and the time before that, and because he knew what would happen this time. Yes, he was wrong, but there's nothing he could have done to deserve that. His brother destroyed that action figure that day and left marks all across Sam's body.

It's one small story out of millions and they never end with happy endings. If you've been bullied, you know you carry those scars with you the rest of your life. Sometimes you forget them, sometimes they haunt your nightmares, waking you up in the middle of the night crying out for someone to comfort you, and they always affect every relationship you have with friends and co-workers.

I've been bullied and because of it, I've bullied, too. If you have any power or authority over those with less, please share. Give up some of your power and give it to them. Give them strength and courage and most of all, healing. Sam needs it. He's searching. He's hoping. He's lost and confused. Show him what true power looks like and change the fate of a generation.

No. 9

"I slept too late again. No time for breakfast. Whoa... I'm speaking English. Is this English? What just happened? Umm... I can't remember... My Chinese... I forgot how to speak Chinese!"

王伟! 你醒了沒我要上班你的功課還在桌上,不要忘記,再見。”
(Henry! Are you awake yet? I'm going to work. Don't forget to take your homework, it's still on the table. Bye.)

"What did she just say? Is this really happening? I can't speak or understand any Chinese. How am I supposed to go to school? It's okay... I'm sure I'll remember. Once I'm at school it'll all come back to me. Too bad I don't have any English classes right now. Oh, my Chinese teacher is going to freak out.

Shirt, pants, teeth, face, book bag, ready. Let's go. Why do all these street signs look so foreign. Oh... that one's in English... but I still can't understand it. That's strange. I understand that one. Let's just get to school and everything will be fine.

"哈羅"
(Hello)

"Hi"

“你有看到李秀英嗎?她剪頭髮...我覺得太短。”
(Did you see Li Xiu Ying? She cut her hair... too short I think.)

"What?"

李秀英理髮了。”
(Li Xiu Ying cut her hair.)

"Okay"

你今天很奇怪。”
(You're very strange today.)

大家坐下來,先交給功課
(Everybody sit down and turn in your homework.)

I can't understand. I still, really, truly, can't understand. This is a nightmare. Why! I can't let anyone find out. I have to keep this hidden until my Chinese comes back again. How can I tell people anyways? I need to find out what happened and fast... so fast no one finds out and thinks I've gone crazy. Let's start with the basics~ Life from day one~ Today is number nine. It all started nine days ago.

What is everybody doing? Oh... homework... wait... where's my homework? Oh no...

The Wings of a Butterfly

He walks back down that familiar road. His whole life is contained within it. He uses this time to reflect after each day. The seasons and weather and shops all change, but it's always the same spot on the map. It's small. No one thinks much of it. It normally brings him joy, escaping from all the busyness and people for a few minutes, but this time it only brings loneliness.

His whole life has been building up to this moment, but he doesn't recognize it. He's finally getting that breakthrough, but it's not what he imagined it would be like. A little girl runs into him from behind. He can't figure out what happened and she's already crying. He looks down behind him and notices her sitting on the ground with her hands over her face. Just beyond her is a cat with those glowing eyes that remind you it's related to the great cats: leopards, jaguars, and tigers.

"What's wrong?" He asks the little girl. The cat jumps into her and changes into a butterfly. It's one of the white ones, beautiful, but not particularly noticeable. It flies up towards the skyline and a single rain drop falls on his face. He doesn't notice any clouds, but a crack of thunder sounds through the sky, sounding more like a lion than real thunder.

He can barely see the butterfly anymore, but he can feel its weight, hear its roar, and remember its pain. There's strength through pain and pain in strength. The man flaps his wings and flies into the night. It's the same old road, but he's been away too long. He retraces those familiar steps right back home. The cat cries in a lost alley. The little girl pounces. The strength of a great cat hidden in the wings of a butterfly.

The Story of Little Billy Bumpkin

Little Billy Bumpkin was too short to play basketball and too shy to have many friends. He ate food too slowly and was afraid of being wrong. His teacher used to tell him, "Billy, try your best. A wrong answer is better than no answer." But Little Billy Bumpkin wouldn't dare open his mouth. The only thing he was good at was drawing.

Little Billy loved to draw on all his notebooks, homework, and tests. His teacher said they looked cool, but he said that about everyone's drawings. One day he drew himself and when he was finished, he just stared at the picture. He was surprised to see himself on his notebook, staring back at him. Then another boy nicknamed Tall Tony walked up from behind him and laughed at Little Billy's drawing. Tall Tony was much bigger than Billy and really good at basketball.

Billy immediately covered up his drawing and his face turned red. Tony ripped the picture from Billy's hands, though, and showed everyone in the class. They all thought it was good fun and they laughed and laughed. That day, Billy found out that he wasn't as good at drawing as he hoped, so he gave up his silly hobby and decided he wouldn't draw ever again.

No one talked to Billy very much, but when they did, they all asked him if he had anymore drawings. He refused to answer and pretended he was working on an assignment. Little Billy worked hard at school and did well at all his subjects. His parents were proud, but Billy didn't feel very happy. That's because the kids in school didn't understand him and started calling him bad names.

Little Billy Bumpkin was a good student, but he was too afraid to stand up for himself. On the last day of school, Tall Tony laughed at Billy and said, "Little Plump Pumpkin, why don't you draw us something? We really want to see it." Of course, Little Billy was too shy and didn't say anything. He just listened to the others laugh at him. Then he suddenly remembered his teacher's words.

"Try your best, Billy. A wrong answer is better than no answer." He didn't know why he remembered this, but he got up from his chair nonetheless. Then, he walked over to the whiteboard and started drawing. The kids looked at each other in surprise as they all tried to see what he was drawing. Billy's head blocked their view until he was finished, and then he slowly walked back to his seat and sat down.

As soon as the kids could see the picture, they laughed and they laughed. Everyone laughed except Billy. Instead, Billy started crying. The more they laughed, the more he cried. He cried because he wasn't good at drawing after all. He cried because he couldn't be good at anything. And he cried because his teacher was wrong. No answer is better than a wrong answer.

His tears only added to the other kids' laughter. And then Tall Tony walked up to the drawing. He stared at it for a long time. He saw himself on the basketball court, but instead of a ball in his hands, there was a tree. Instead of a basketball hoop, there was a sun. And instead of a basketball court there was a field. He saw himself trying to shoot that tree into the sun. He wondered how it would grow and what it would look like in the future. He was curious if that tree would ever reach the sun.

Then Tony turned away from the drawing and looked right at Billy. He walked past the other kids and put his hands on Billy's shaking back. Then everyone got quiet as the teacher walked into the room. Tall Tony watched as Billy looked up with red tear-stained eyes at the teacher, then his drawing, and then at Tall Tony. Billy listened as the teacher saw the drawing and commented how great it was, but he didn't care. His teacher said that about everyone's drawings.

Then Tall Tony whispered in Billy's ear. "Go, Billy, Go." Those words stopped all the tears in his eyes and he saw that drawing again. He took out his notebook and he drew. One by one, the kids all made their way over and stared. They couldn't help but to stare. And Billy drew. He dreamed and traced and shaded and created the most interesting drawing he made up until that day.

Tall Tony smiled a cheerful smile the whole time and he never had to wonder how trees shooting into the sun would grow or what they would look like to reach the sun. Billy showed them. He showed all of them. Then Billy understood his teacher's words and he knew they were right.

Little Billy Bumpkin never stopped drawing after that day and his drawing skills never stopped improving. If you look closely enough, you might even find yourself in one of his drawings, the story of Little Billy Bumpkin.

A Snapshot From "You know, that week: A Story of Belonging"

Why does it still smell like Taiwan?” Christopher says out loud. He still remembers all the attention, all the pictures, and all the fandom from being an American living abroad.

His mind starts recalling memories at will. It doesn't matter how long he's been away. He knows where everything is. He knows the morning routine. Teas and breads and dumplings fill the table downstairs. It's life. Signs of life. There's no plan for today, but he knows the expectation. If he's staying in L.A., he has to find a job. There is no other choice.

It's only day one and it feels like Taiwan still. He walks to the bathroom and it suddenly hits him. Jet lag. 'What time is it?' He slept enough, so he will force himself to stay up. He's had it worse before.

The morning is silent. Everyone understands each other. Everyone feels comfortable. There are no need for words.

The morning is just as quiet for Mary, L.A.'s newest movie star. She has fresh fruit and chocolate milk; a combination even she isn't too sure about, but the craving was there. “Today I'll make this city my playground.”

She feels safe in the back of her car with tinted windows, but she knows she has to get out of it sometime. The gym is her first priority and her first mistake. Recordings, pictures, and screams cut her time short. She feels frustrated and unstable. It's the beginning of a complete breakdown.

It's time for tea.

Christopher borrowed his dad's car. It takes around forty-five minutes to get into downtown without heavy traffic. He makes it in under an hour and parks in a meter spot. He has no agenda. He's simply checking out the new city. It seems new anyway.

All skyscrapers appear the same, but he tries to focus in on the subtle differences. The textures. The windowsills. The corners. The doorways. The arches. He's seen it hundreds of times, but he can still notice new beauty when he needs to. Here in L.A., he's desperate for it.

And then he sees something totally new. A new Asian tea shop. And they sell bubble tea. This, he has to try. He orders the original and looks for a seat. Nothing. He just came from Taiwan though. A table for four with one person is a waste of space.

“Excuse me, is this seat taken?” Christopher asks, expecting a quick reply.
Mary takes off her sunglasses and looks at the table, which has her stuff conveniently spread all over it. She already has the word 'yes' in her mouth, but he doesn't seem taken by her at all. Actually, he just looks tired.

“No, sorry.” She says and takes her things back so he has space to sit.

Christopher looks around the shop. It's mostly Asians, but they all seem to be staring at him. Everything is Asian-themed and the bubble tea is almost the right flavor. A flash goes off and Mary gives a frustrated look across the store.

“Did someone just take a picture of me again?” Christopher asks Mary.

“Do you get that a lot?” Mary asks.

“Sometimes. It can be quite annoying, you have no idea.”

“You really don't know, do you?” Mary questions him.

“Oh no, am I famous here?”

Mary laughs and looks directly into his eyes. 'There are still people that don't watch TV,' she thinks. Just then, somebody walks in and screams Mary's name. Christopher looks back and then to Mary.

“Who are you?” he asks, confused.

“Maybe it's better you don't know. At least one guy can be normal around me.”

“Thanks, I'm kind of used to the attention myself.”

“And why is that?” Mary asks, thinking how arrogant he is.

“Because I speak fluent English.” Christopher says it with a serious face, but Mary just stares at him, trying to figure him out. He doesn't add anything.

“Who are you?” Mary says, starting to smile.

“I'm Christopher. Nice to meet you. And you're Mary?” He guesses.

“Yes.”

“I'm bad with names. Sorry if I forget it.” Christopher says right away. Mary still can't tell if this is all a ploy, but she's amused anyway.

“So what do you do?” Mary asks as Christopher takes a sip from his bubble tea. She watches the little balls get sucked up through his straw and bounce around in the corners of his mouth when he answers.

“I'm a translator. Well, I was a translator. Not anymore.” A slight pause. “And what do you do?”

Another slight pause. “I'm an actor.”

“Oh, like on the commercials?”

“More like on the dramas.”

“Anything I would know?”

“Apparently not.”

More flashes strike off Christopher's eyes and Mary realizes that their faces have slowly drifted towards each other. It seems she's already figured out what tomorrow's gossip headlines will be. She backs away and lets the reality of who she is sink in. 'Surely he knows at this point. Now it's time to see his crazy side.'

Christopher replies. “Unless you're in a Taiwanese drama and can speak fluent Chinese or Taiwanese, I don't think I would have heard of it.”

“Where do you live?” Mary asks in shock.

“Now?” Christopher seeks clarification.

“Yes!” Mary says too loud.

“L.A.”

She gets quieter. “And you haven't seen any advertisements with me in them? The ones posted on every block?”

“Not yet, but I'll be sure to look. I just got back to the States, so sorry if I seem apathetic to your new TV show. I'm sure you do a great job in it.”

“You've been living in Thailand, haven't you?”

“Thailand?” Christopher says, looking offended.

“Didn't you say something about Thailand?”

“It's Taiwan.” Christopher corrects her.

“So I said it wrong. Anyway...” Mary tries to change the subject, but is interrupted right away.

“It's a different country. Thailand is in southeast Asia. Taiwan is an island country off the coast of mainland China. They speak different languages and eat different foods. They have completely different cultures.”

“Thanks for the geography lesson.” Mary's eyes get big as she takes a deep breath and then finishes the rest of her tea. “But I have to go.”

“Sorry, but a lot of people are just really ignorant.”

She stares into his eyes again and can tell he really is being sincere. “How about we meet here again on Thursday. Same time?”

Christopher looks around because of how quietly she said it. “Sure,” he whispers back at her. And without any hesitation, she's already out the door with flashes following. It takes about thirty seconds for the questions to start.

“Wow! Are you going out with her? What did she say? How do you know her?”

Christopher says something in Chinese and leaves as fast as he can. He stumbles over the chair and spills his tea on the floor.

“Sorry, sorry,” he says in Chinese to the manager. They strike up a conversation in Chinese and people slowly start going back to their own business. 'Who did I just meet?' Christopher wonders to himself.


Prove Yourself

Why do we feel we have to prove something?

I have to make an impact to make my life matter. I need to be important and influence others to feel I've done enough, or at least done something. I must be different, popular, special, famous, loved, shared, liked, known.

1 John 3:16 This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters.

John 15:13 Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one's life for one's friends.

Matthew 16:25 For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will find it.

James 4:6 But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says: "God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble."

I'm still trying to cover my sins by working, by doing good. I'm trying to blot out deep stains. If I make a difference in the world, a big difference in the world, then it will be enough. I'll be satisfied. I'll have peace.

Is Jesus' blood enough for me?

But I have to tell more people, do more things, make my life matter. Then I can finally prove something.

And all along I know the truth. God loves me. I'm important to Him. I matter to him. He knows me. I'm famous in His eyes.

Comforting one crying child is proof enough of a life lived well. It means everything. And then I look at myself and see I am that crying child. And it's God who comforts me. I don't work to get into the grace of God. I'm His child. I am God's child.

I have nothing to prove.

Jesus' blood is enough.

I'm covered in the shadow of His grace.

No more working.

Now, I live freely.

Welcome to the kingdom. Here, we lose our lives for our brothers.

The Greatest in the Kingdom

I was teaching a couple middle school students the Bible and thought it would be interesting to get their perspective on what Jesus says about children. I went to Matthew 18 and we read the text together. I was surprised to find out that they don't even identify with the passage because the children Jesus was talking about must only be eight years old (for some reason I don't know) and they are thirteen years old.

I continued anyway, however, and asked them what they think is so special about children that Jesus said we have to become like them if we want to enter the kingdom of heaven. They said children are pure and innocent. I immediately found this ironic because I'm talking to two children who are not pure or innocent. At thirteen years old, however, they aren't actually children anymore, since in Jewish culture they would have partaken of their Bar Mitzvah and been considered men.

So what does Jesus mean then? Are we supposed to become pure and innocent to enter the kingdom of heaven? Maybe. But then I thought about all my other students who are eight years old and thought, a lot of them are not very pure or innocent either. Some definitely are, but it's not a common characteristic throughout each one. I didn't have an answer, so I kept reading forward to the next section.

It talked about how terrible it would be for anyone who causes one of these little ones to stumble and how it would be better for a millstone to be tied around their neck and tossed into the sea. Then I remembered a different passage where the children were trying to get to Jesus, but their disciples wouldn't let them until Jesus rebuked them and allowed the children to come.

Children are not viewed as equals with adults actually. We see them as less intelligent, less important, and less reliable. There are reasons we do this, but it shows that there is a status difference between adults and children. And then Jesus says we have to become servants of all to be the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. Jesus says we have to take the lowly position of a child to become the greatest. Furthermore, we have to change and become like children to even enter the kingdom of heaven.

The passage is less about thinking naively that children are somehow all pure and innocent and instead considering their powerlessness. They have a low position and always rely on others above them for their needs. If we want to be the greatest, we have to do the same. We must take a low position, be the servant of all, and rely on others for our needs.

That means you can't look for every promotion and shortcut when they step over others. That means you can't think a retirement fund is your answer for your future security. That means you can't depend on yourself to get by, but must look out for others, lifting them up to high positions, meeting needs around you, and trusting the King of Glory to look out for you, just like a child.

Welcome to the kingdom. Here, we always take the lesser seat.

Amen.

We Cannot Love People If We Do Not Care For Creation


There's an island off the coast of Taiwan called Green Island.

On one of the hills along the coast is a lookout point and a long narrow path leading to it.

Jesus said the path that leads to eternal life is narrow and there are few who find it.

I think he was talking about a radical lifestyle that didn't go along with the masses, but instead followed the will of the Father.

We must find this narrow path even when the whole of society is living differently.

This is especially true when it comes to the environment.

Everyone might depend on cars, over-consumption, excessive purchases, ineffective diets, and helpless ignorance about environmental issues, but not us.

We search for that narrow path leading out to the lookout point.

If you look at anything long enough, it starts to seem normal.

Maybe you heard stories of victims who defend their captors.

Perhaps you've changed your mind about what's right or wrong to say or do.

When we see the planet and our cities, we just think it's normal.

But here's the truth. It is anything but normal.

It's not normal to breathe through smog and throw out heaps of trash everyday.

The world was never meant to be polluted with massive carbon emissions, man-made chemicals, and useless junk.

Maybe it's all we know, but that doesn't make it normal.

Imagine aliens coming to our planet and seeing how we live.

They would be shocked, thinking there were massive fires everywhere and wondering what the smell was.

Or perhaps their planet was already destroyed and Earth simply reminds them of where they went wrong.

Don't be inspired when people don't care about protecting our environment.

Don't believe it when someone tells you the planet is just fine.

There is a problem.

And there is a different way to live that will lead to a sustainable future.

People's lives, whole nations, and the planet itself is at stake.

But more, it is our responsibility.

This was our calling.

This is our purpose, to have dominion over creation.

It's not like the abusive husband who walks away from his kids.

This is the loving father who cares for his creation more than his own life.

We can't even imagine now the damage being done all around the world.

This is not love.

It can't be because it's harming those people affected, even us.

That's why we must care for the environment and drastically, radically lower our carbon footprint.

We must reduce our trash and be creative about recycling and saving our energy and water.

Love people, for this is also loving God Himself.

But we cannot love people if we do not care for creation.

Eternal Life

I'm captured by the story of the rich young ruler. (Matthew 19:16-22)

These are two very different men encountering each other. Jesus and this rich young man.

You have to understand Jesus is from a poor background and doesn't have a place of his own. He sleeps at other people's houses and ministers daily to the poor and needy.

He came to save and seek the lost. He came for the poor who were forgotten by the rich and condemned by the religious elite. But Jesus has a reputation and this young man has a question to ask.

'What must I do to inherit eternal life? I've already inherited riches, lands, property, and everything the world can offer. Now what must I do to inherit eternal riches? How do I add even more to my wealth and inherit spiritual wealth?'

Can you imagine Jesus's response? Sell all that you have. Sell all your wealth. All your property and riches and houses. Sell everything.

He must be thinking about everything he has and how hard his family worked to acquire all of it. How hard he must have worked to acquire it. And then to sell all of it. Everything.

Not only that. But the money he gets from selling everything he has to give to the poor. Take everything you and your family have ever worked hard to possess and give it all to the poor and then follow Jesus. Follow Jesus. Have no place to lay your head. Live among the poor. Minister to them. See them. Touch them. Be them. Follow Jesus.

How can this be? I believe Jesus is so right because this rich man in fact had nothing, even with all his riches. He had nothing. Nothing.

Jesus said to store up for yourselves treasures in heaven where moth and rust do not destroy. This man had no treasure in heaven and therefore he had nothing. He had a means to bless others, but he wasn't doing it and so he had no treasure at all, for all his treasure will rust and be destroyed.

But he could sell all of it and give all that money to the poor. He could alleviate the injustice between the rich and the poor and store up treasure in heaven be blessing them. And then he could follow Jesus to live among them, teaching, healing, and ministering to them.

I'm challenged with this call. It's not houses, land, comfort, or health that can give me any treasure in heaven. It's giving it all away that gets me eternal life. To live needy. That's what it means. And yet to never have to go without because there is enough for everyone when we share. It's all about faith.

We have to trust God will provide our daily bread. We have to live needy. Sacrifice it all and risk everything on the Son of God. That's how we gain treasure in heaven. That's how we gain eternal life.

Amen.

How to Learn a Language

If you're not living abroad...

Be excited!

Learning a language is fun actually. Speaking to other cultures in their language is like having the key to unlock the door into a new world. You aren't just an observer anymore. You are part of their world. So have fun with it. Don't worry that you sound like a hyped-up chipmunk or an alien from another planet. Just go with it and laugh at yourself.

Take a class!

If you pay the money, you'll see the results. You don't have to study four or more years. Just take enough classes to where you understand the basics of the language. Then, you can start studying on your own. Don't try to start from scratch all by yourself. You'll get discouraged faster than you can even learn how to say 'how are you?'

Find native speakers!

Not every native speaker will have the patience to endure your strange attempts to mimic their language, but some will! Find one of those people and be silly. Ask questions and try out new words and phrases. Go to different places and contexts and ask again. Make your language learning practical and efficient.

Try it first, grammar later!

Any language has grammar rules. There are certain ways to put words together that sound funny and other ways that sound natural. Of course there are lots of rules you can learn to memorize and make sure you understand the roots of the language. Don't worry about all that up front. First, just learn those easy phrases and start speaking. If you can't say anything, you'll be really discouraged trying to learn those grammar rules, but if you can say a few basic conversations already, those grammar rules will make more sense. A few phrases can go a long way in learning a new language.

Listen!

There are tons of free videos and audio programs where you can listen to basic conversations with translations. Read along as they speak and try to repeat after them. Listening to a language is really important to understanding people. Don't feel frustrated when you can't get anything they're saying. Your brain is wired to assume that language is nonsense and it doesn't even try to process it. Force yourself to listen in to every sound. Every one has meaning and when you focus on the words, you will find you're beginning to understand more and more.

Read!

Maybe you only want to learn speaking and listening, but one of the best ways to do this is to build your reading and writing skills. Reading helps build your sentence structure, grammar, practical phrases, and vocabulary. You can take your time dissecting an article or story and then analyze it. Writing helps you really ingrain those new words, phrases, and sentences into your mind. If you write it down, you'll be more likely to remember it. Don't skip out on writing and reading. They are the keys to solidifying your speaking and listening skills.

Mix and match!

Don't focus too much on one medium to learn a language. There isn't one textbook or website or teacher that can teach you a language. Even if they are the best, you'll get bored. So try out new books and programs and teachers. Learning a language is part of who we are. Don't take it lightly, but also believe you can do it. And most importantly, don't give up.

If you're living abroad...

Sorry, living abroad is not enough to learn a language. Most people who live abroad long-term stay within their own communities and hardly ever speak the language of the culture they're in. If you want to learn a language living abroad, there are a few sacrifices you'll have to make.

Find new friends!

You will experience culture shock, depression, and isolation, but if you make friends with the people of that culture, you will start to learn their language. Of course if they already speak your language, this won't be true, but be clear up front that you want to speak their language and keep searching for more people who don't speak your language. Conversations will be awkward at first, but you'll both want to communicate and you will find ways to do it. Remember the words and phrases that person spoke. Look them up later and learn them. Now you're already speaking like a local and you'll find they speak differently than your textbooks.

Don't stop using old tricks!

Studying is just as important living abroad as not living abroad. The difference is you can really use the vocabulary and phrases you're learning right away. Whenever you learn a new word, use it that day. If you use it, you'll keep it. Or you might find out they say it differently. Sort through all the words you're learning and keep using those practical ones every chance you can.

Ask questions!

This is really key. There will be many times you won't know how to say something and then slowly you'll find your listening skills are getting better than your speaking ones. Other people will start guessing at your meaning and you'll say, "Yes! That one!" You understand it, but you can't say it. So ask them to teach you how to say it, how to spell it, or how to write it. Have them write it for you and then learn it yourself. If you don't know how to say something, don't just resort to "this one" or "that one". Actually ask them what it's called or how to say it. Make the world your teacher and you'll have the best education anyone can offer.

Be encouraged!

When you implement these techniques, your language will improve, but you won't be able to see it at first. It will be gradual, happening over time. Look back at your old notes or textbooks and see how easy they seem now. You are learning the language and it's getting easier and easier. Talk with old friends you haven't seen in a while and watch at how amazed they'll be at your improvement. You can interact with the local population and really learn this language. Be excited, keep studying, have fun and most importantly, don't give up! You can do this!

Forest People

History.

We're all connected to it and for as long as we've been on Earth, there's always been progress.

Technology.

Science.

Each city has their own story. Conflicts, in-fighting, competition, migration, restarts. History has a habit of repeating itself. We study and learn from it, but we're blind to the fact that we're right in the middle of it all. It's another round of good versus evil.

My name is Jeremy Baxton and I know the truth. There are hundreds of cities, but none like mine. All the others use concrete to build roads, buildings, and factories. Each city is free to live how they choose to. Their choices would never be sanctioned in my city, though. They can produce goods without a license, low quality, cheap products that will just end up in a dump somewhere.

We're an impatient people. In the other cities, the technology is less advanced, but they call us primitive. They developed transportation that runs on oil and products that leave behind harmful pollutants. We stayed in the wilderness. Anyone is welcome to come and go, but most people only come here to trade. Not many can accept the lifestyle. It's not ancient, we just remember our roots.

And I remember the truth. We didn't survive through all those conflicts all on our own. We had help. I have the book to prove it. We were destined to survive, led by an invisible hand. We are always brought up to our present moment to make a choice.

It's good versus evil. Life versus death. Blessing versus cursing. We all paid the price for choosing the latter, but not so in my city. We choose to believe in another way. When there's a choice between cars or buses, we say there's more. When it's a choice between harmful factory emissions or poverty, we say there's more. When there's a choice between low prices or high quality, we say there's more.

We live differently in my city because we paid a different price. We sacrificed selfish desires to dream bigger. We found comfort and progress with life and health. Call us forest people if you want. We like it. We're making a new choice, right in this present moment.

We choose _______.

A World Without Nature

What if we created a world where we never saw nature?

What kind of life would you live?

You'd probably get annoyed at every bug you saw.

You'd probably think life was all about pain instead of all about beauty.

You'd probably feel stuck, always wanting to get out, but not knowing where.

You probably wouldn't run around or simply stare at your surroundings.

You'd probably forget to look up and get stuck with your head down.

You'd probably never lose your breath or cry with joy for no reason at all.

You'd probably see things in black and white, or maybe just gray.

What if we reversed it though?

What if we experienced nature every day?

You'd see in living colors.

You'd be breathless with tears running down your face.

You'd be stuck with your head in the clouds.

You'd run and never lose your stare.

You'd feel home, right where you belong.

You'd see beauty and, for a moment, forget about your pain.

You wouldn't even realize the bugs flying and crawling all around you.

You'd be too lost in nature's call.

Let's put the wild back in the world.

The rivers are running, the wind is blowing, the moon is shining, the rocks are glistening, the waters are shimmering, the winds are howling, the plants are dancing, the insects are buzzing, and all of creation stands in eager expectation for the sons of God to be revealed.

We are a new creation.

Amen.

Litter

Can you imagine someone taking an empty bottle and throwing it into the wild?

Imagine staring at the wonder of creation before you and then noticing a plastic bottle in the midst of it.

It would ruin the entire picture. You would see the impurity there and weep in your heart for what has become of something so beautiful.

How could you do something like that?

And the same is true in our hearts when we trespass against God and others, harming ourselves and the world we live in.

We throw empty bottles into the beauty of creation. And we bring a tear to the face of everyone who looks up on it, even God Himself.

There is anger for retribution and longing for reconciliation.

It needs a revival where someone walks down by that riverside and picks up that garbage, removing the impurity and restoring creation to its original beauty.

God can do that. He walked among us as Jesus and died to blot out any impurities within us.

He makes us beautiful.

He restores us.

He breathes on us.

And we are His.

Pure.

Holy.

Righteous.

Now go, and litter no more.

為甚麼那麼愛教會?

為甚麼那麼愛教會?

意義。

我都會思考我每一個責任的意義,不管是工作、家裡、學校、私人關係、等等,我們都有責任,但一個責任不一定有好意義,因為我們常常浪費時間跟能量所以我特別要確定我每一個責任的意義。

我思考我的意義的時候我發現我每一個責任沒有長期的意義,我老闆覺得如果我很努力工作我會對公司好,可是我的工作的目的是甚麼?如果我公司覺得賺錢是他們最好的目的,這會對老闆好但對別人有甚麼好處?我們每一個對話也一樣,我們講話的題目是廢話或真有深入的意義?我們很常常討論短期事情而不要想我們未來或永恆的事情。

思考這些事情會讓我很沮喪,如果我的生命有很多廢話我真的沒有意義,但思考這些事情也會提醒我, 我需要做不同的改變,我要對家人、朋友、同事好可是如果我沒有永恆的角度我沒辦法給他們好影響。

我們怎麼得到永恆的角度?就去教會可以得到。

我去教會的時候才知道我被上帝創造的,我也應該反映上帝的屬性,祂是良善的、正義的、慈愛的、不輕易發怒的,我們不充滿這些屬性因為我們都是罪人,我們需要學習上帝的屬性而自己悔改讓上帝改變我們。

我去教會都聽到我生命中的意義,我們有任務,就是自己改變而反映上帝的屬性還有告訴別人他們的意義是甚麼,有時候我們開心但如果我們完成上帝給我們的目的我們一定會感覺到真真的喜樂跟平安,我們一起去教會再聽一下我們生命中的意義,我們一定會被滿足了。

阿們

Forgotten Men

We've lost something.

Manhood has forgotten something.

There's a healthy stubbornness protecting values of strength, courage, and justice.
We've lost it, though.

We've blurred lines of what it means to be leaders of families, businesses, and nations.

These are things I learned from my grandpa. He doesn't stand for hypocrisy or a wasted life.

We are called to something and we have things we must do.

We can fight through problems and struggles and obstacles to gain strength and wisdom and identity.

We can become those lost men, those pillars that represent ancient values carried on through generations.

We need to be reminded of these examples. We need to honor these examples. We need to become these examples.

I'll keep striving. I won't give up.

WORDS

Language.

The medium of life.

Sounds and words and phrases combined into sentences and speeches and books.

Our spoken words.

The written word.

They carry more than the physical. They're spiritual power.

We speak and write to create.

They're patterns and formulas without which we can't express who we are.

It's prayer, direction, request, information, clarity, expression, love, laughter, meaning, communication, but it's also curses, hate, mockery, debasing, and regrets. We can't take them back. They're forever imprinted on memory chips, forgotten but not lost.

It's words of hope we hold onto the most. Like a student who gave up, admitting weakness and giving in to despair. A student who desperately needs prophetic words. Words filled with choice. Words filled with hope. Continue pursuing that love for language you have. You are a joy to all you share your words with.

Don't give up, but press on.

It's a student too comfortable in their environment, speaking incoherent empty words absent of power. Words of rebuke may be heard or the deafening from their own communication may drown out other streams of communication.

Most often, it's the words we try to plant in each other that we ourselves need.

Language is about choice.

What patterns will we follow? Whose patterns will we use? How will we form our structure and papers and answers?

Language is about power.

The potential energy each word has. It's written that every word spoken by God finds its fulfilled purpose. Not one goes back void.

Language is about belief.

Believing in the unseen reality that each word can produce gardens or barren land. They can bring beauty or smear over it.

Language has life.

Use every sentence with care and faith. Language is the medium of life. Books, speeches, and sentences made up of phrases, words, and sounds. Whether written or spoken, each word is cherished and precious. It's the power in your life.

Speak life.

Write hope.

Use language for love, the blessing of the Creator.

You know, that week: A Story of Belonging (Chapter 1)

Monday

Life on the island. Hot. Humid. Too many cars. But the fruit is delicious. The roads are too narrow for four lanes of traffic, but it happens. There's an advertisement on every building along with a store name, making every street a colorful spectacle. This isn't the west, though. This is Taiwan. Farms still merge with city life. Look over a bridge or behind a storefront and you can see where some of your food just came from.

And occasionally, you see a rarity: a westerner. This is the life Christopher has known for the past twelve years. It gets boring at times, but it's incomparable to the secluded life back home in California. Christopher came to Taiwan with a better job prospect than his own country could offer. It helps a lot when you're fluent in two languages, especially two very important languages.

Christopher's family is Taiwanese, but he was born and raised in L.A. As there were plenty of needs for translators in Taiwan, Christopher took the opportunity, exploring his family's country for the first time. Today that dream is going to disappear. He's about to tell his manager he's flying back to L.A. on the next available flight.

His manager has no idea what's coming. Christopher didn't want anyone to convince him otherwise. He speaks in English and the more he shares, the more heated he becomes.

“I'm leaving. I'm leaving because I can't stand to do this monotonous job any longer. There's no purpose. I should be doing something important with the skill set I have, but I'm stuck behind a computer everyday. And then, when I get off work, I have to walk through this smog-filled city with people who think I'm superhuman just because I speak English.

“The food's oily, the ground's dirty, the people are ignorant, and I just don't fit in. It smells terrible here and I'm getting on the next available flight out of here. Thanks for the job and I hope you find someone else to translate all of your marketing gimmicks. Goodbye.”

“Christopher,” his manager, Mr. Chen, starts to plead with him, “will you consider...”

The door shuts. Christopher already has the stuff he needs. He knew he would stay if he listened to what his manager had to say. It's time to go. It's time to go home.

L.A. has a less shocking Monday for Mary, the newest movie star who just became the face on everyone's news feeds. It's partly because of the creativity of the show she's on and partly for her talent that she hit the big time. The show is a futuristic melodrama filled with crazy gadgets and unbelievably cool characters. All the classic ingredients are there: deception, revenge, scandal, betrayal, romance, and plot twists with every episode. It was an overnight success and its main actress is Mary, a girl from middle of nowhere America. Now she's another L.A. Star, enjoying time off after the smash ending to the first season.

She had to adapt to the new fan base: big clothes, wigs, alien sunglasses, and lots of make-up. There's no escaping the fans, though. Especially the crazy ones. She walks down the busy skyline filled with people and cars and shops, not because she's trying to be seen, but because she still refuses to give up the normal life she once had, as well as the chance to find a decent guy. Now it's all the same. They are either much too crazy and sick, or too scared to say anything. There's always dating another star, but that feels too much like caving in. She's about to meet one of the crazy ones now; one of the fans before she made it big. That's what they all say.

It's a private tea house. You can get a snack, escape the sun, and relax, but how does someone uninvited find himself in the bathroom of an invite only shop?
That's Domitian. He has a job that mainly pays on commission, but he still sacrifices his time for the chance to make a great first impression. Today his timing is perfect. He has his chance to meet Mary. The one hundred and fifty-eight centimeter Latino department store worker leaves the bathroom with his hair slicked back and his shirt too tight around his chest.

Mary takes her seat and sighs deeply at the first sight of him. 'Here comes the speech,' she thinks to herself. And it will come. Domitian's face gets hot and his stomach twists as he stumbles over the floor, catching himself before coming within two meters of her.

“You are so stunningly gorgeous my love. I've seen all your shows and you are the most talented...”

Before he barely gets started with his well-rehearsed speech, a security personnel is already in his face, telling him to leave or he'll get arrested.

He shares the abridged version as he walks out, “I'll see you in every re-run. Just think of me. It's Domitian. I'm watching you. I love you.” The end trails off as Mary orders a drink and blocks the memory from her mind.

'Why can't guys just be normal?'

Sitting in the private shop alone gives her time to reflect on the last year of her life. She can't believe things could have changed that quickly. It's time to make a choice. Is all of this what she really wants? Will she give up the chance for a normal family to become the next big star?

She didn't know it would mean all this, but here she is: face plastered all over the country and yet hiding away from all the flashes. 'It's already here. I just have to admit it. Goodbye all you crazy men. It's time to flirt with Hollywood.'

The airplane takes off around evening time. It will be a half a day before Christopher touches ground again. He'll get to L.A. in the middle of the night because of the time difference. It's like he's flying into the past, going back to his old life. He's about to get his reality checked, though, because everything has already changed. He's a zombie when he jumps into his dad's car. It was short notice, but his dad had the time and a taxi would be too expensive.

“Hey Dad.” Christopher says in Chinese, jumping into the car. His family always speak Chinese to each other.

“Welcome back, Christopher. Did you bring everything?” His dad is referring to the usual dried snacks and cakes his family always buys when they make trips back to the island.

“I was in a hurry, so I just picked some things up at the airport.”
“So no pineapple cakes?”

“There's probably a couple in the variety packs.”

“Did you eat yet?” His dad asks the important question. His mom is already preparing their nightly meal at home.

“Not yet.”

His dad focuses on the road. Christopher lays back and listens to whatever pop radio station is on. It takes about an hour to get back to their house. As soon as they walk-in, they remove their shoes and the feasting is on. The house is huge compared to anything Christopher was living in in Taiwan. They have a front yard and two stories. For California standards, though, it's on the small side.

The evening marks a safe passage home for Mary. She drank three different drinks filled with sugar and ate a New York-style cheesecake. It was a little celebration for her. She no longer has to worry about strange guys. She's going to make it single and enjoy all the work she put into getting here.

The pictures start flashing with her first step out of the store. She puts a hand up and keeps walking. It's like there's no escape from the hound dogs. The sooner she makes it home the better, but it shouldn't be this way. Can't they just watch the re-runs if they want to see her again? This is curiosity turned approval turned excitement turned obsession. 'Remember your dream.' Which one?

You know, that week: A Story of Belonging (Chapter 2)

Tuesday

“Why does it still smell like Taiwan?” Christopher says out loud. He still remembers all the attention, all the pictures, and all the fandom from being an American living abroad.

His mind starts recalling memories at will. It doesn't matter how long he's been away. He knows where everything is. He knows the morning routine. Teas and breads and dumplings fill the table downstairs. It's life. Signs of life. There's no plan for today, but he knows the expectation. If he's staying in L.A., he has to find a job. There is no other choice.

It's only day one and it feels like Taiwan still. He walks to the bathroom and it suddenly hits him. Jet lag. 'What time is it?' He slept enough, so he will force himself to stay up. He's had it worse before.

The morning is silent. Everyone understands each other. Everyone feels comfortable. There are no need for words.

The morning is just as quiet for Mary, L.A.'s newest movie star. She has fresh fruit and chocolate milk; a combination even she isn't too sure about, but the craving was there. “Today I'll make this city my playground.”

She feels safe in the back of her car with tinted windows, but she knows she has to get out of it sometime. The gym is her first priority and her first mistake. Recordings, pictures, and screams cut her time short. She feels frustrated and unstable. It's the beginning of a complete breakdown.

It's time for tea.

Christopher borrowed his dad's car. It takes around forty-five minutes to get into downtown without heavy traffic. He makes it in under an hour and parks in a meter spot. He has no agenda. He's simply checking out the new city. It seems new anyway.

All skyscrapers appear the same, but he tries to focus in on the subtle differences. The textures. The windowsills. The corners. The doorways. The arches. He's seen it hundreds of times, but he can still notice new beauty when he needs to. Here in L.A., he's desperate for it.

And then he sees something totally new. A new Asian tea shop. And they sell bubble tea. This, he has to try. He orders the original and looks for a seat. Nothing. He just came from Taiwan though. A table for four with one person is a waste of space.

“Excuse me, is this seat taken?” Christopher asks, expecting a quick reply.

Mary takes off her sunglasses and looks at the table, which has her stuff conveniently spread all over it. She already has the word 'yes' in her mouth, but he doesn't seem taken by her at all. Actually, he just looks tired.

“No, sorry.” She says and takes her things back so he has space to sit.

Christopher looks around the shop. It's mostly Asians, but they all seem to be staring at him. Everything is Asian-themed and the bubble tea is almost the right flavor. A flash goes off and Mary gives a frustrated look across the store.

“Did someone just take a picture of me again?” Christopher asks Mary.

“Do you get that a lot?” Mary asks.

“Sometimes. It can be quite annoying, you have no idea.”

“You really don't know, do you?” Mary questions him.

“Oh no, am I famous here?”

Mary laughs and looks directly into his eyes. 'There are still people that don't watch TV,' she thinks. Just then, somebody walks in and screams Mary's name. Christopher looks back and then to Mary.

“Who are you?” he asks, confused.

“Maybe it's better you don't know. At least one guy can be normal around me.”

“Thanks, I'm kind of used to the attention myself.”

“And why is that?” Mary asks, thinking how arrogant he is.

“Because I speak fluent English.” Christopher says it with a serious face, but Mary just stares at him, trying to figure him out. He doesn't add anything.

“Who are you?” Mary says, starting to smile.

“I'm Christopher. Nice to meet you. And you're Mary?” He guesses.

“Yes.”

“I'm bad with names. Sorry if I forget it.” Christopher says right away. Mary still can't tell if this is all a ploy, but she's amused anyway.

“So what do you do?” Mary asks as Christopher takes a sip from his bubble tea. She watches the little balls get sucked up through his straw and bounce around in the corners of his mouth when he answers.

“I'm a translator. Well, I was a translator. Not anymore.” A slight pause. “And what do you do?”

Another slight pause. “I'm an actor.”

“Oh, like on the commercials?”

“More like on the dramas.”

“Anything I would know?”

“Apparently not.”

More flashes strike off Christopher's eyes and Mary realizes that their faces have slowly drifted towards each other. It seems she's already figured out what tomorrow's gossip headlines will be. She backs away and lets the reality of who she is sink in. 'Surely he knows at this point. Now it's time to see his crazy side.'

Christopher replies. “Unless you're in a Taiwanese drama and can speak fluent Chinese or Taiwanese, I don't think I would have heard of it.”

“Where do you live?” Mary asks in shock.

“Now?” Christopher seeks clarification.

“Yes!” Mary says too loud.

“L.A.”

She gets quieter. “And you haven't seen any advertisements with me in them? The ones posted on every block?”

“Not yet, but I'll be sure to look. I just got back to the States, so sorry if I seem apathetic to your new TV show. I'm sure you do a great job in it.”

“You've been living in Thailand, haven't you?”

“Thailand?” Christopher says, looking offended.

“Didn't you say something about Thailand?”

“It's Taiwan.” Christopher corrects her.

“So I said it wrong. Anyway...” Mary tries to change the subject, but is interrupted right away.

“It's a different country. Thailand is in southeast Asia. Taiwan is an island country off the coast of mainland China. They speak different languages and eat different foods. They have completely different cultures.”

“Thanks for the geography lesson.” Mary's eyes get big as she takes a deep breath and then finishes the rest of her tea. “But I have to go.”

“Sorry, but a lot of people are just really ignorant.”

She stares into his eyes again and can tell he really is being sincere. “How about we meet here again on Thursday. Same time?”

Christopher looks around because of how quietly she said it. “Sure,” he whispers back at her. And without any hesitation, she's already out the door with flashes following. It takes about thirty seconds for the questions to start.

“Wow! Are you going out with her? What did she say? How do you know her?”
Christopher says something in Chinese and leaves as fast as he can. He stumbles over the chair and spills his tea on the floor.

“Sorry, sorry,” he says in Chinese to the manager. They strike up a conversation in Chinese and people slowly start going back to their own business. 'Who did I just meet?' Christopher wonders to himself.

Mary stays out of sight for the evening. She has a sense of hope within her and she has to share it. She's still the same girl underneath all the fame. She dials the number and tenses with each ring that intensifies the nervousness she feels. She won't answer.

“Hello?”

“Jessica?”

“Who is this?”

“It's Mary. I had to change my number. Sorry it's been awhile.”

“Mary!? From TV?”

“Mary from high school. Your friend, Mary. You know?”

“Yea of course. Wow!” Jessica starts talking quickly in the background to someone. “You won't believe who I'm on the phone with. It's Mary, like the Mary. I can't believe it. Hold on a second.”

“Listen Jessica, I don't want this to be weird. Just thought maybe we can talk like old times again.”

“Definitely. Where do you live? Is this your real phone number? Is there anyone with you now? Where are you right now? Are you pregnant?”

Mary drops the phone. It may be a time for a new number again.

“Hello? Hello? Oh no! I think the call was dropped. Mary! Don't worry, I'll call back!”

'Why did I ever want this?' Mary thinks as she walks away from the phone and tries to think about something positive.

Christopher.

It's the normal routine at Christopher's house. He listens to every conversation between his father, mother, and sister. It's like a record on repeat. It's like they never get tired of the same conversations. He was like that too, but that was before twelve years in Taiwan working as a translator for a company that only cares about profit.

He's glad he's gone. Glad he left.

“Any new job openings, Christopher?” His father turns the conversation to him. It starts.

“I'll start looking tomorrow.”

“What did you do today?” His mother joins the conversation.

“I tried out a new tea shop downtown. And I met someone pretty interesting. Have you ever heard of Mary?”

“The Mary?” His sister can't help but respond.

“The one on TV.” Christopher says.

“We've been watching her every night. Mom and Dad love her.”
“She has incredible talent,” his dad clarifies.

“Yes, she seems really interesting.” Christopher thinks back to the tea shop.
“So you're thinking of acting?” his mom asks.

“No,” Christopher laughs. 'What am I thinking?'

“Find a job first. Think about TV dramas later,” his dad says.

His sister teases him and the conversation turns to a different topic. It's only been one day and Christopher is more confused than ever. 'Why am I more concerned over this girl than finding my new career? And why is everyone so infatuated by her? She's just a person. And so am I.'

Chapter 3